Do you know your RULES?
FULL PODCAST EPISODE 022
Today is day 7 of our 9 day podcast series on how to upgrade your relationships, and we’re talking about the rules of the game. Whether you’re a mother, son, doctor, entrepreneur, or whoever you are, what do you have to do to feel like your best version? Once you answer this question, you’ll tap into the deep reservoirs of your brain and find your rules, and everyone has rules about themselves, others, who they like or dislike, etc. It’s similar to our other podcast on love languages, and how people need different things to feel loved.
How do you know you’re being a healthy strong individual? The answer varies by person. Some people have the rule of needing to be vegan in order to feel healthy, while others need to go for a daily run or drink water. This doesn’t just relate to health, as you have your own standards of what makes you a good parent, friend, employee, or whatever other roles you assume. It’s also important to know what takes you away from success so that you can avoid those mistakes.
Determine what your rule book is and how you can play the game of life to feel successful. Tony Robbins asked people at his seminar what it would take for them to feel successful on a daily basis, and one guy stood up and said that he needed to be making 10 million dollars a year, have 6% body fat, and all of his kids need to be in university. What are the chances of this guy feeling successful? Very slim because he is not in control of his children, he can’t determine their future. Make sure you’re in control of your rule book rather than someone else. You can’t say you’re happy when others are happy, because their happiness is not in your control. My rule book is simple, I’m happy when I’m interacting with people. You want to make it simple for you to feel successful, and difficult to feel like a failure. My rule for failure is that I’m a failure when I’m beating myself up and not doing anything about it. By the way, Tony Robbins asked someone else what it took for them to feel successful, and they said that every day above ground is a great day.
As you get to know yourself, understand the rule book of your friends and family, what do you have to do in order for them to feel like you’re being a good friend/partner? Understand other people’s rule book about you, so at work what do you need to do for your boss to feel like you’re being successful? What does it take for you and others to feel like it’s Christmas? People may say the lights, music, eggnog, gingerbread, people, or anything else that invokes the season.
Keep in mind that your mood will change your rules, and they’re constantly updating based on your life experiences. My suggestion is that you put together a code of conduct on how you wish to conduct your life, who you want to show up as, your standards, and what life is about to you. How do you view the world? It’s not what life gives you, it’s what you do with what you’re given. We’re always growing so make sure you write your rules and occasionally update them. You can also add more to your rules everyday and slowly grow your list.
If you learn the rules of others and meet them where they are, you’ll have friends for life. Now if you feel like the people around you don’t respect your rules, you need to take responsibility for your life and find the right people to be around. Your environment is very important, and the people around you definitely impact your behavior. If you’ve heard the serenity prayer, then let me share my version of the prayer with you, and my wish is that you repeat this prayer everyday until it’s ingrained in your subconscious. “God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the people I can, and the wisdom to know that it’s me”. You can’t change others, you can only change yourself. Know your rules and that of those around you, and your relationships will gain an incredible amount of depth.
To your continued evolution, live it up with POWER, PURPOSE & PASSION!
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